Let’s be real—starting a conversation on any dating app can feel like trying to break the ice with a stranger at a party where you’re both pretending to be cooler than you are. Facebook Dating is no exception. Even though it’s part of the app you already know and scroll through every day, when it comes to making the first move, you might still feel that awkward “uh… what do I say?” moment.
Don’t worry. We’ve all been there. The good news is, it doesn’t have to be complicated or cringey.te real connections—without overthinking every word.
Why Making the First Move Matters
Before we dive into the how, let’s talk about the why.
A lot of people hesitate to make the first move because they don’t want to come off too strong or say something dumb. But here’s the truth: waiting around often means missing your shot. On Facebook Dating, the algorithm rewards activity. That means the more you interact, the more visible your profile becomes—and the more chances you have to connect.
Plus, confidence is attractive. Reaching out shows initiative, and when done right, it makes you instantly more memorable.
Tip #1: Actually Read Their Profile
This might sound obvious, but you’d be surprised how many people just skim and swipe. Facebook Dating gives users space to share a bio, photos, prompts, and sometimes even linked Instagram posts. Use that.
Why it works:
It shows you’re genuinely interested, not just randomly messaging everyone with a profile pic.
How to do it:
Look for anything unique—travel photos, a quote, a hobby, or even a song lyric in their bio.
Example Opener:
“You mentioned hiking in your profile—got a favorite trail? I’m always looking for new places to explore.”
It’s personal, friendly, and it gives them something easy to respond to.
Tip #2: Start with a Question, Not a Statement
“Hey” isn’t a conversation starter. It’s a digital shrug. Questions, on the other hand, invite responses.
Why it works:
People like to talk about themselves. Asking a question creates an opening for them to share more, which makes the chat flow naturally.
How to do it:
Ask open-ended questions based on their interests or photos.
Example Openers:
“That photo with the guitar—do you play or just posing like a rockstar?”
“You mentioned sushi is your favorite—got a go-to spot in the city?”
Keep it playful and light, but show you’ve paid attention.
Tip #3: Be Funny, But Don’t Force It
A little humor goes a long way—especially in a sea of dry, recycled messages. If you can make someone laugh, you’re halfway to winning their attention.
Why it works:
Laughter builds instant connection. It makes you seem confident and chill, even if your palms are sweaty while typing.
How to do it:
Make a clever observation, toss in a light joke, or just poke fun at the dating app experience.
Example Openers:
“So what’s your favorite thing about awkward first messages?”
“I was going to open with a pickup line, but I figured you deserved better.”
Stay away from anything edgy or too sarcastic. Keep it clean, friendly, and self-aware.
Tip #4: Compliment Something Specific
Generic compliments are forgettable. Yes, they know they look good. If you’re going to compliment, be intentional.
Why it works:
It feels more sincere and makes them feel seen—not just swiped.
How to do it:
Look for unique details. Maybe it’s their travel photo, their smile, or their dog’s name.
Example Openers:
“Your travel photos are incredible—where was that waterfall pic taken?”
“You’ve got great taste in music. That Arctic Monkeys tee is everything.”
Avoid overly sexual or shallow compliments. Those are instant turn-offs.
Tip #5: Use a Profile Prompt to Your Advantage
Facebook Dating offers built-in profile prompts like “The last show I binge-watched…” or “A random fact about me…”
These are conversation goldmines.
Why it works:
Prompts give you ready-made content to start a conversation without guessing.
How to do it:
Reference their prompt, react to it, or answer it yourself in a fun way.
Example Opener:
“You binge-watched Breaking Bad in one weekend? Respect. I tried that and ended up dreaming about Heisenberg for a week.”
It’s playful, shows personality, and feels effortless.
Tip #6: Reference Shared Interests or Groups
If you matched through a shared Facebook Group or mutual Event, use that connection.
Why it works:
Shared context makes starting a conversation way easier. You already have something in common.
How to do it:
Mention the group or event casually and spin it into a question.
Example Openers:
“Hey! I saw we’re both in the ‘Foodies of Atlanta’ group—tried any amazing spots lately?”
“You’re going to that outdoor concert next weekend too? Can’t wait for it.”
This makes the chat feel natural, not forced.
Tip #7: Keep It Casual and Low-Pressure
Don’t make it feel like a job interview. Your first message should feel like a quick hello, not a script you practiced in the mirror.
Why it works:
No one wants to feel like they’re being grilled. Light, casual intros are easier to respond to and less intimidating.
How to do it:
Stick to one or two sentences. Be friendly. Show personality.
Example Opener:
“I’ll admit it—I was hoping you’d show up in my matches. Glad we matched!”
It’s chill, direct, and positive.
Tip #8: Try the “This or That” Approach
This is a fun way to get a conversation going and learn something about them.
Why it works:
It’s easy to answer and leads naturally to more convo.
How to do it:
Pick two interesting, quirky, or thoughtful options.
Example Openers:
“Tacos or pizza for the rest of your life?”
“Would you rather travel back in time or teleport anywhere instantly?”
It’s fun, it’s low-stakes, and it gets people talking.
Tip #9: Avoid the Creepy Energy
Just being honest here—there’s a line between confident and creepy, and it’s thin. Make sure you’re on the right side of it.
Why it matters:
If your opener is too forward, too flirty, or too intense, you’ll probably get ignored or blocked.
How to avoid it:
- Don’t comment on their body in your first message.
- Don’t send overly personal or sexual jokes.
- Don’t ask for their number or Instagram immediately.
Keep it friendly, curious, and respectful. Save the deeper vibes for later.
Tip #10: Be Yourself (Cliché, But True)
At the end of the day, the best strategy is to be you. If you try too hard to be funny, mysterious, or cool, it usually backfires.
Why it works:
Genuine messages stand out. Most people can tell when you’re being real vs. putting on a front.
How to do it:
Let your personality come through. If you’re a bit nerdy, a foodie, an introvert—own it.
Example Opener:
“Not gonna lie, I mostly joined Facebook Dating because I ran out of people on Hinge. But hey, here we are!”
Humor, honesty, and personality—all in one.
What to Do After They Reply
Making the first move is step one. Keeping the conversation going is step two.
Here’s how to keep the momentum:
- Match their energy — If they give you one-word answers, don’t write essays.
- Ask follow-ups — Dig a little deeper into what they said.
Remember: the goal isn’t to impress—it’s to connect. Start simple, stay curious, and be yourself. That’s how real conversations (and real chemistry) begin. - So go ahead, give it a shot. Who knows? Your next match
- Share a bit about you — Don’t just ask questions. Give them something to respond to.
- Know when to suggest a meetup — If the vibe is right and convo’s flowing, don’t be afraid to ask if they’d like to grab coffee or go for a walk.
Conclusion
Making the first move on Facebook Dating doesn’t have to feel awkward or forced. All it takes is a little attention to detail, a hint of personality, and a sprinkle of confidence. Read their profile, be thoughtful, and don’t overcomplicate it. People appreciate effort—especially the kind that feels genuine.
might be just one scroll away.